BULLYING ON THE INTERNET
Cyberbullying happens when one or more people use the Internet, e-mail, online games, messages on a mobile phone, statuses or comments on social networks (Facebook, Instagram, Twitter...) to humiliate, belittle, scare, insult, tease and similarly.
If someone harasses you on social networks or sends you messages that disturb you and in which ugly things are written about you, it is important that you talk about it with someone. There are ways you can protect yourself.
WHY DO SOME PERSONS BULLY OTHERS ON THE INTERNET?
It is very difficult to answer the question of why someone starts to bully another person, whether the bullying happens in reality or on the Internet. Sometimes a person who bullies another person does not intend to hurt them and they do it out of ignorance, believing that teasing or provoking someone will not hurt that person. Sometimes a person feels bad about himself because he has his own problems and thinks that it will be easier for him if he hurts another person and if that other person also feels bad. Sometimes the person who bullies is eager for attention and doesn't know how to get that attention in a good way, and then hurts and belittles others, believing that this will gain popularity and make them feel better.
No matter how uncomfortable someone feels about their problem, it is never an excuse to bully someone else. If they have problems, the person who bullies others can, and would do well to seek help in order to feel better. Bullying others is always wrong.
Sometimes a person chooses to insult, belittle, humiliate, intimidate or embarrass other people over the internet or mobile phone because they feel safer this way. Sometimes it's easier for the person who bullies another person to bully them via the Internet or text messages on a mobile phone because they can't see how much it hurts the other person and then it's easier to justify their violent behavior. Texting and correspondence can happen so quickly that a person does not think enough about his words and does not consider how offensive and unpleasant the words he writes are for the other person.
SOMEONE IS HARASSING YOU THROUGH A MOBILE PHONE, WHAT SHOULD YOU DO?
Try to do the following things:
- Do not respond to messages that have unpleasant and offensive content!
- Save all such messages you receive and show them to an adult you trust
- Do not answer calls that do not show the caller's number (hidden numbers)
- Do not answer calls from a number you do not know
- If the bullying continues and you don't know who the person is bullying you, you can change your phone number and give the new number only to your closest friends
- Be sure to share the problem with someone and explain what is happening to you. Don't try to solve the situation on your own and keep it to yourself. Tell a trusted adult, parent, grandparent, uncle, teacher, class teacher, or anyone you trust. The conversation itself can help, and that person can help you to find together a way to protect yourself and what exactly to do in the situation you are in.
- You can report what is happening to you to the police, and you can also report it via the Blue Phone
HOW TO PREVENT SOMEONE FROM BULLYING YOU ON SOCIAL NETWORKS?
Social networks allow for some great things like connecting with others, sharing content with other people who are not in your city or country, and so on. Some people, unfortunately, use these networks to bully others.
Setting up a secure profile is a very important part of social networking. It is important to set up your profile so that you have as much control as possible over your profile and know who will see the content you publish. Remember that you have the right to block anyone who is harassing you and to report offensive content to that social network to have such content removed.
HOW CAN YOU FEEL WHEN SOMEONE HARASSES YOU ON THE INTERNET?
Cyberbullying can be a very serious form of bullying. If someone bullies you, you can feel scared, upset, confused or even have the feeling that everyone is against you.
The problem with this type of bullying is that you can feel like you have no control over when and what someone posts, and that content can be seen by a lot of people. It can be scary sometimes. The bully can post comments or write from a fake profile, hide their IP address and use a special mobile number just for the purpose of bullying. You can have the feeling that the whole group is turned against you.
No one has the right to do such things and mistreat you in this way!
If someone is harassing you on the Internet or on your cell phone, it is really important to talk to an adult you trust. This could be a family member, a teacher, a friend or a Blue Phone counselor. There are ways to stop bullying and talking to someone is often the first step in getting help.
Some people who are bullied start doing things they wouldn't normally do, to cope with painful emotions or to escape from painful emotions. Some even self-harm or isolate themselves and suffer in solitude.
It is important to know that there are people who can help you and that it is very important to talk to someone about everything that is happening to you. With the right support, things can get better.
You can always call Blue Telephone for free on 080 05 03 05 or write to us anonymously via email.
WHAT SHOULD YOU DO IF YOU LOSE YOUR SELF-CONFIDENCE BECAUSE SOMEONE HAS BULLED YOU ON THE INTERNET?
Bullying hurts. If more people get involved in bullying, it can be a huge blow to everyone's confidence. Your confidence is something you can work on. Sometimes it's not easy, but you can do some things for yourself that would help you strengthen your self-confidence despite some people writing or saying ugly things to you.
What can you do for yourself?
1. Talk to someone about what's happening to you!
Sometimes it may not seem like talking can help, but it often does. It can be relieving when you express everything that hurts and troubles you. It is best if you can tell someone everything, to "let it come out" of everything you are thinking about and how you feel. Choose carefully who you will tell about all this. Let it be a person who will certainly listen to you and in whose vicinity you feel comfortable. In the conversation, it can also help you to look at the situation from a different angle. You can also call the Blue Phone.
2. It's not your fault!
You may think that you are doing something wrong that you deserve to be bullied. That's not true! People bully others most often because:
- they feel jealous
- they want to hide something bad that is happening in their life
- they want to hide that they feel bad and have a bad opinion of themselves
- they think that this will make them popular and make them feel better
It is important that you know that if someone writes ugly things about you on the Internet, it says more about that person than about you. It speaks to an ugly trait of the person writing it, not you. Bullying is not your fault! No one deserves to be mistreated by someone else.
3. Use your anger in a positive way.
If someone bullies you online, it's completely normal to feel angry. Anger can prevent you from feeling defeated.
Anger is not the same as aggression. The fact that you feel angry does not mean that you will write something ugly to someone or that you will do something that will hurt that person. If you do something like that, then anger becomes a problem. Try to feel your anger and express it in a way that will allow you to understand it more. You can draw when you feel angry or write about it in your journal. You can discover what things make you feel better. It can be running, crying, after which you leave the house and walk your dog if you have one, it can be hanging out with friends. Use the energy of anger to do something good for yourself.
At the same time, it's a great tactic to not vent your anger online. Try not to show that you are disturbed by what is written on the Internet. You can do that and at the same time accept your anger. That way, the person who is bullying you will not have the satisfaction of having upset you and you will start to feel that you have more control over how you react.
4. Help yourself feel better.
Anyone can experience bullying. Sometimes you might think it's your fault, but the truth is, it's not. It is important that when someone mistreats you, you protect yourself and not hurt yourself further by feeling guilty.
Try to think of the other person's negativity as a hot potato. If someone throws ugly things at you, words... try not to catch them or hold them back. Think of those ugly words as a hot potato that you will immediately throw out of your hand if someone gives it to you. You can do that by writing down your thoughts, painting, drawing, going outside, doing some exercises, and the like. It is important that you find a way so that unpleasant thoughts do not occupy you and do not overwhelm you.
A good way to get rid of discomfort is to write on a piece of paper "When I get angry, it looks like this..." and then draw how you see yourself at that moment, and after that you can put the drawing away somewhere, you can tear it up and release the drawing by putting it away and his anger.
You can take a piece of paper and finish this sentence "I feel... because..." and by completing these sentences write as long as you can and as many sentences as you need to write everything you feel. After that, crumple the paper and throw it away or put it away somewhere. This is how you can learn to control the impact of bad words someone says to you and get rid of the negative impact those bad words can have on you - so, do what you think is best for you to achieve that.
PARTICIPATING IN BULLYING SOMEONE ON THE INTERNET. WHAT CAN YOU DO TO FIX IT?
The first step is to realize that you are participating in bullying someone. All people make mistakes and that doesn't mean you're a bad person.
- Seek advice - Tell someone you trust, e.g. a parent, a teacher, a relative and ask them for advice. Maybe they'll tell you what you can do to fix things.
- Delete all nasty messages about someone.
- Take a stand - Talk to others involved in bullying and encourage them to stop bullying too. Sometimes it only takes one person to make a big difference. It could be you.
- Apologize to the person who is being bullied by you and offer them support. It can mean a lot to that person and that gesture is very important.
- Learn a lesson - Sometimes we do things that we don't think about first, but it is important that you learn from this situation how you can do better and apply it in the future.
